The Voices in My Head

“Unbending”. “Opposite of her ancestors”. The name probably has a few other meanings and literary implications, some flattering, some not. I won’t compare myself to her too closely.

But certainly, I am unbending. I have, at least twice in my life, pursued some goal that, on the face of it, seems pre-destined to failure due to insurmountable odds. But each time, I persevered, and succeeded. ironically, I seem to have more success at these bigger goals than I do at the mundane day-to-day living.

And in many ways, I guess I am the opposite of my ancestors. I have invented my own religion (which I don’t plan on proselytising much. Don’t follow me - start your own godamn religion). I suppose each time a religion started, someone must have started it, but they are by far the exception from the norm. I also regard myself as a card-carrying member of the Internet age (despite an allergy to remembering my PIN numbers). Both my parents were born before computers were much more than military secrets, and, if they had their druthers, would keep it that way.

Me? Antigone? For sure I am. I am here to stay. I shall never be gone.

So I’m contemplating a move to the US of A to study, and possibly work. And it occurred to me that, should I decide to apply for citizenship, I might, nay, will, be asked to swear some silly pledge of allegiance.

One of my hobbies is collecting passports. I have no problem with swearing any silly pledge in order to further that hobby. But any pledge of allegiance won’t mean a thing. Not because I don’t believe in such pledges, but because my allegiance is not mine to give.

I owe my allegiance to a higher power than any mere nation. And no, I’m not getting all religiousy on y’all.

(more…)

So I was cleaning out my mother’s fridge, and what do I find?

• A jar of red hot chilli peppers, best before date: 1999.
• A jar of black olives, best before date: 2002.
• A jar of sun-dried antipasto, best before date: May 2006.
• A jar of mayonnaise, best before date: I don’t know, since the writing had faded beyond readability.

Sometimes, she scares me.